14 In Fabulous over Fifty

Social Media… Not My Reality

It used to be so easy! If you didn’t want to compare yourself to Christie Brinkley or Cindy Crawford, you left the magazine on the table.

Now, it’s not so easy and according to most of what I see on IG, I am not good enough. HA! 

I am 59 years old and I am intimidated by social media. My social media accounts are never kept up to date. If you look at my Savvy Snowbird IG account you will notice that I often use other people’s pics!

 

Randi Garrett Design

As I look at the accounts that I follow (RG is one of my favs, check out that dog bath!) I can’t help but compare my pics to all of theirs and I wonder how can I ever compete. My photos are not good enough. I question my blog topics.  I worry about my lack of knowledge. Who am I to write about nutrition, fashion or decor? Is everyone else really an ‘expert’? Is it ok to just be me? 

If I, as a savvy aged adult feel this way what is it doing to our youngsters? How can they grow up feeling confident? How do they grow up with authenticity?

 

Cute snowsuit Meagan!

My friend (she’s a shenanigan enthusiast) made a post of her snowmobiling trip on IG. She made winter look so good that I was actually envious. I wanted to go! Hahaha as if!! Winter and I are never in the same sentence.

Blog: Decor Gold Designs

I follow some decor bloggers. Their homes are immaculate! Is that their actual reality? Don’t they have pots soaking in the sink from the night before? Do they seriously make their bed before they even get out of it? Is their toothbrush ever on the counter?

What about these fashion bloggers? They are magnificent creatures that wake up with nary a hair out of place! Makeup is on! Their outfit is complete with shoes and accessories…and if by chance we catch them in their PJs on a Saturday morning you can bet your sweet butt that their pyjamas look so soft, their fluffy robes match their slippers and their hair is in a perfect messy pony tail.

 

I love following food bloggers, don’t you? Wow! Their pasta and shrimp come right out of the pan and is presented perfectly on a plate that happens to match the dish towel that was thrown carelessly on the counter and lands with perfect folds! Sometimes they are able to pick up roasting hot pans with their bare hands!!! Seriously incredible stuff! If you missed my super yummy recipe for pasta and shrimp you can read about it HERE

All of these images create a reality that is impossible for most of us to meet. Personally, it creates a reality that I have no desire to meet. I’d be exhausted.

It took me a while to realize that I will never be one of these creatures of perfection. If you see a photo of my home in perfect order you can bet your boots that I removed a pile of ‘stuff’ to make it happen.

These stats are from an article I found online in Huff Post written by Clarissa Silva. Scientist. Strategist. Relationship Expert “I did an in-depth interview on social media and its impact on men and women, ranging from ages 28-73, that are active social media users and found that”

  • 60% of people using social media reported that it has impacted their self-esteem in a negative way
  • 50% reported social media having negative effects on their relationships
  • 80% reported that is easier to be deceived by others through their sharing on social media

So what can we do about this for our own well-being and for our loved ones too?

  1. Stay busy. The more time you spend on social media, the more time you have to compare yourself and your surroundings to others.
  2. Do unto others. The more we can do for other people the better we feel about ourselves.
  3. Remember that Social media is no different than magazine stagings. The more popular lifestyle bloggers are often sent free products to feature in a post. They have assistants, some have professional photographers and designers helping them.
  4. Fill your social media accounts with people that make you feel motivated and share positive vibes that coincide with your own thoughts and feelings.
  5. Practise unconditional self-love and awareness. Be happy for other people while staying true to yourself.

As I look around my back lanai I can see Steve’s towel draped over the back of the chair “drying”.  Tank’s blanket is scrunched up on the couch with some serious fraying. My shoes are parked on the floor by the door just waiting for me to trip over. There is a throw blanket on the ottoman that was yes …actually thrown there!  My tea cup is beside my coffee cup from this morning …

THIS is my reality. I am OK with it!

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14 Comments

  • Reply
    Steve
    February 26, 2022 at 10:51 AM

    Thought that was an excellent blog. I am amazed that everything I learn about social media comes from my Granddaughters. However, I am also terrified at what affects it has on their upbringing.

    I worry that it will effect their own social skills and street smarts.

    • Reply
      Marion
      February 26, 2022 at 11:19 AM

      I actually thought about doing the flip side of this post and list some of the positive ways social media can influence us. Children, teenagers and even adults use it to make and maintain friendships. I love staying in touch with some of my friends from high school. I have made friends on FB that I never would have without it. We get to share interests with each other….the world and all it has to offer is literally at our finger tips… we can learn so much about any topic we want! I love being inspired by my favourite bloggers! Unfortunately it’s on the parents to watch, listen and set parameters for little ones. Same as what our parents did for us and TV….only bigger!
      PS….thanks for being my number one fan! XO Love you.

  • Reply
    Marion
    February 26, 2022 at 11:46 AM

    Loved this blog M. You be you and feel comfortable with your choices. I’m grateful for social media most days , but I AM choosing what to read and not just blindly watching it all. This pandemic has brought people together in social media and I am sure made others question it. Why, if it wasn’t for zoom and FaceTime I’d not have ‘seen’ my daughter and family living in another country, nor enjoy this blog. Keep up the good work. I love it. Hugs m

    • Reply
      Marion
      February 27, 2022 at 12:09 PM

      If it wasn’t for FB you and I wouldn’t be the friends that we are today and who would have got me through that first 24 hours last May 4th!!?? I thank goodness for you all the time and will never forget your kindness and support. You gave me the strength to get through the scariest day of my life! As for social media…it allows me to do this!
      You, have a terrific day! Xo

  • Reply
    Sherri
    February 27, 2022 at 7:58 AM

    Life is a messy affair…I’ve deleted accounts that are too perfect. If there’s not a pile of books, a racing form or newspaper within arms reach and cozy throw, it’s just eye candy and I’m out
    As adults we’re able to make critical decisions and realize no one really lives in these photos…..but children need to be taught this skill. When I was a kid I hoped id live just like George Jetson, because that’s what I saw on tv.
    Let’s not even mention TikTok

    • Reply
      Marion
      February 27, 2022 at 12:05 PM

      Ha ha…..the Jetson’s were the best family! LOL I am not a Tik Tok user, but it’s my understanding that it is very popular with the kids. Little ones making short videos for all of the world to see…eesh!!!!
      Parents need to be involved and set strong parameters!
      I think you retired just in time Sherri!
      Looking forward to our hikes in the spring!!! Xo

  • Reply
    Helen Bowkett
    February 27, 2022 at 8:23 AM

    I enjoy your blogs and personal experiences that to many may seem the idyllic life. I have no interest in social media or those who consider themselves “influencers”. I proudly chart my own course. This week I shared with friends these powerful words by Steve Jobs, someone worthy of my time and respect who gave more than influence to the world.
    “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

    • Reply
      Marion
      February 27, 2022 at 11:59 AM

      Such wise words by a man that really came to understand what was important in life.
      He was taken from us way too soon.
      Thanks for your comments Helen…have a great Sunday!

  • Reply
    Christina
    February 27, 2022 at 9:14 AM

    Hi Marion, even though we know this, your blog was very insightful and right on point !! We are bombarded with images 24 hours a day and it’s hard not to compare…thanks for the “keeping it real” reminder.

    • Reply
      Marion
      February 27, 2022 at 11:46 AM

      Christina….what a great tee-shirt logo that would be ‘keeping it real’I love it!
      I follow you ‘Dirt Diva’ on social media and have shared your contact information too…..this is a great example of how social media can truly help us build businesses and contacts!
      Spring will be here before you know it and you won’t have a moments peace to get on social media!!! LOL
      Thanks for stopping my and leaving a comment.

  • Reply
    Mary Lynn
    February 27, 2022 at 10:24 AM

    It’s like anything if used properly it can be a great platform. I love seeing pics of my friends kids and grandkids, interesting things people I know are doing. I am old enough to realize things aren’t always as they appear but I agree for young people it is a struggle and hard for parents to monitor. Social media is good and bad but it’s not going away. Great article.

    • Reply
      Marion
      February 27, 2022 at 11:42 AM

      You are so right ML! I mentioned that below in my response to Steve. I have visited museums, countrysides, concerts that I would never have seen without social media! As with anything in life its all about balance.
      I hope you are doing well and enjoyed your trip to sunny PS!!!!

  • Reply
    Val
    February 27, 2022 at 12:19 PM

    Hey Mare! I’ve never been on any social media platforms ever, No FB, no IG, no Tik Tok and I don’t feel like like I’m missing a thing! Just FT to visit with all the kiddos and grand kiddos. In retirement now, I’m living the dream and loving my reality too!
    Keep up the great work with the blog 👍

    • Reply
      Marion
      March 3, 2022 at 3:47 PM

      You ar missing nothing my friend and your reality is pretty sweet!!!

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